25-ish years ago I cut three words into my skin - UGLY, SLUT, WHORE. All capital letters. All with a razor. The first word I cut when I was 11.
I’m making these three words into three artworks.
“How much does your soul cost?” was my starting point for this project. I ask myself what I was hiding inside of me and how much I would charge to share some of those stories.
1. THE PLANNING
I started out with the papers and the theme.
Planning my pages - this has took me about a week. From picking the pages to figuring out composition and making rough sketches… this is where I’ve landed. Included photos of the pages before I do anything to them.
2. PROCESS
I've written about my process previously in Calender Girls, Feeling Blue and the main Vintage Girl page. I still wanted to include some process photos to take you through the making of each of these.
At 11 I cut the word "whore" into my arm in an attempt to deal with shame and trauma. At 17 I burnt the word "off" with a pack of cigarettes, smoking them one by one and then pressing them into the scar.
2. "UGLY"
I did cut this into my forehead as a weird echo of all the times I was told I was ugly as a child. I tried to silence it, reclaim it, by showing the world that I had accepted it.
3. "SLUT"
This one was possibly the hardest one to make. I cut the word "slut" into one of my breasts. It was also the very last time I cut myself so it sits differently in my memory.